A Beautiful Mess

I am sleepy so I just want to say that my roomates are still amazing! I also just have to mention how great life can be. It is hard and stressful and crazy but it is good. I am having my share of trials right now...ok really it is not very many and there are days I just want to have a quiet simple life...then I remember the times when it is quiet and I am glad for the chaos. School can be so hard sometimes but I love it. I love to craziness. I love having to stay up till 4 in the morning to do homework. I love somehow finding time in all that to do family history work...I love learning to juggle...I think as I get older I am learning how to enjoy now to forget the past and not overly concern myself with the future...I am not always good at this...I am a planner and as such I remember everything and I think I have to plan everthing and do everything and everything has to be just right. WHO CARES!! Life it life...it comes and goes and we just have to hang on to what we know is right and do the best we can. It is funny for me to have this change...I have had my "life plan" for several years...I knew what I wanted to be when I "grow up" and suddenly that is changing and the opportunity for new things has presented itself. In that past that would have scared me but now I think Oh good...something new. I really think California changed me...maybe that is why I loved it so much...that and the beach...:) I don't know what is going to happen...and that does intimidate me but somehow it is going to work...it may suck but it will work...maybe that is the key to happiness..just learning to lose control and enjoy the ride...hmm...

The simple things

So coming back to school was a little nerve raking for me. Most of my close friends up here at BYUI have graduated or they are married. I was nervous about moving into a new apartment complex and I was nervous about my class load (justifiably so) Well in the end it has all worked out!! I am quickly making new friends, and my roomates are GREAT! They are a lot of fun! I am really grateful to my Heavenly Father for helping me out!...I know that Laura talked me into moving here for a reason...I am sure I would have had nice roomates else where but these ones are great! I can't believe it is my last year here in Rexburg! This place has been such a great place for me to grow and learn! I am 3 times the person I would have been had I not come here!! I truly am grateful to my Heavenly Father for blessing me with amazing friends who help guide and direct me to the places I need to be. Today I am grateful for the simple things. :)

Tribute to my Dad

So tomorrow it will be five years since my Dad passed away. For those of you who don't know he was killed in a motorcycle accident. Someone passed illegally and well yeah. It still seems strange most days...not having him around. I know people always say Time heals all wounds but I don't think that is true...I think that we become stronger. I don't think it will ever go away..nor do I expect it to. I will always miss my Father but I know with out any doubt in my mind that I will see him again!!! I also know that he keeps on eye on me, he lets me know in little ways. A song here, a funny joke there. Anyhow the real reason I am writing this is because I wanted to give ya'll a little glimps of what my Dad is like. These are a few of the things I miss most...He had this laugh that was almost like a snicker...like he had some inside joke that made what ever was funny even funnier. He laughed often and always enjoyed a good joke. We used to watch football together and he would swear at the refs for making a bad call even if they were right. He always had a five o'clock shadow...lol...he could shave and like two minutes later his face was all stubbly again. He loved all things outdoors, camping, fishing, 4 wheeling. He was the hardest worker I have and I am pretty sure I will ever know. He rebuilt our house with 3 blown discs in his back...I don't know about you but I have tweeked my back and little and it hurt like crazy! So I can't imagine 3 blown discs. He loved to figure things out...how to wire the house...how to fix a car...what ever he just liked learning. He was so impatient whenever we had to stand in line or anything but he would drive slowly down the country roads just to look at scenery. He loved to chat with people...he made friends very quickly. Mom or I would ask him to run to the store for eggs or something and he would be gone forever...cuz he found someone to talk to...he used to call me and talk...but sometimes I would get frustrated cuz he could turn a 3 minute conversation into a 15 mintue one...lol..I miss that. He had gas ALL the time...lol...he would make it stink and then laugh while we all gagged. He LOVED to play jokes on anyone one of his favorite was to sneak up on someone (especially in the dark) and make a snarling noise....my Mom was often his favorite victim....:) He had a stubborn streak, and often a one track mind...once he made his mind up about something it was hard for him to let it go. He was great at working with wood and metal and often made things for us using the scroll saw. He spoiled me rotten...I am such a Daddy's girl. I don't know maybe all these things don't add up to you but they are all these little memories that to me add up to a whole lot. He is a great man and a great Dad...the best I could have ever asked for...he was not perfect haa haa...he would often lose his temper with his tools or what ever and then he would swear at them...he has this kind of Donald Duck voice and then you knew he was really mad....stupid **&#&* tools why did you fall on the *&((*&# floor!! Haa haa...I miss him and I can't wait to see him again when the time comes and feel his stubble face and give him a huge hug!! Well thanks for sticking with me...I know this is a long post but I just wanted to leave you with a poem I wrote for him when he died...I remember this poster he got for my Mom when she started teaching called "Everything I needed to know in life I learned in Kindergarten" For some reason I remembered him getting her that so this poem is kind of like that....

"Everything I need to know I learned from my Dad"

Everything can be fixed...eventually
No one is lost forever
You never have to "grow up" you just have to pay a few bills
Talking to yourself is ok
Paint DOES NOT wash out of clothes
If you want pizza for dinner ask Dad to cook
Laughter really is the best medicine
If you tease someone enough they will get back at you eventually
Share what you have, even if you don't have much
Live for those you love
Pain can be ignored
Work hard, it is always worth it
Play as much as you can, as hard as you can
Honor your promises
Love your family, and they will return your love

So there ya have it...my Dad...he was kind of crazy but I love him!

Tenika invite me to your blog!

Haa haa....so I keep trying to view your blog and I have not been invited...well I was but I didn't accept cuz I am dunb like that...anyhow I am bored out of my mind as usual!! Eric and Jen are writing their talks for church tommorrow so I am gooofing around trying not to annalyze anything too much.

So I am trying to sound optomistic but I truly belive this. I am so greatful for the promises and blessings of a loving Heavenly Father! Somedays it is really hard to be patient and to trust that where I am in my life is where I am supposed to be. I know I have lots of work to do but who doesn't I just have to remind myself to keep going day in and day out and that someday my Heavenly Father will keep His end of the bargian if I can just keep mine.

For Tenika

Jen's bridal shower went well. Not too many people showed up mostly her aunts but if was fun. I am still trying to find a job but I have a couple people that are supposed to be calling me. We will see. I am coming this weekend to Utah!! I am excited to get out of Poky for the weekend. I am coming down cuz Elder Stoker is coming home and has his homecoming this weekend. I am also going to practice Jen's wedding updo so that it is not quite so stressful in California.

Last weekend I went camping and 4-wheeling with my family. It was great! My Brother is funny he told me he was proud of me for not being a pansy really it was not that hard of a trail on Saturday. The one we went on Sunday (yes we ride 4 wheelers on Sunday we are going to hell...lol) was a little more of a challenge and had a ton of mudpddles that were HUGE!!! :) so fun! I was muddy from head to toe...my 4 wheeler got most of it though when we started it was dark green when we left it was brown. I had a great time with my Brother it is so fun to have him around.

So since it was Mother's day last week I just thought I would say I LOVE YOU MOM! My Mom is pretty much the coolest! She is very strong and I have a lot of respect for her and all she does. She is a hard worker and she has always put our needs before her own. So thanks Mom for all you do!!

Boredom

Well it has been quite a while since my last post so I decided I should write something to the whole 2 or 3 people that follow this blog and regularly hear from me anyways...The end of the semester was crazy stressful but I got through and I am "home" in Pocatello right now. I hang out with my Grandma and clean house all day. It is kind of like being a Mom. It is fun though. She is crazy and I totally love her! She has demensia so somedays can be really really hard and frustrating. I am also looking for a job still but it is hard to find one because I need to have some time off to go to my friend Jen's wedding in California where I spent my last summer. I am soooooo excited to go down! It is going to be a lot of fun and I get to do her hair and make-up which I am way excited for. I rented a hotel room at this cool hotel really close to the Santa Anita Race track in Arcadia. It has really pretty grounds. Hmm...not much else is new so TTFN

Life is a bowl of goodness!

Ok so I don't remember exactly how it came up but while talking with Jeff last Saturday (or maybe Friday) he said "Life is a bowl of goodness, all we have to do is lift our spoons and partake." Profound wisdom...haa haa.. it is true though!! This last couple of weeks has been really tough for me. I have a lot on my plate right now, what with school, volunteering, and a church calling. I have been feeling like a complete failure because I wasn't doing everything perfectly for everyone. I let myself get down and let things slide for a while. This included not doing homework for one class that is not that hard and struggling through homework for my Access class which is extremely hard for me. I felt like because I could not do everything I did not want to do anything. This feeling was made worse when I looked at my midterm grade and realized I was getting 40% in my Access class. On Friday after class I was walking home thinking I just needed to drop the class so that I did not get a 'F' but I was not sure when i could possibly retake it. I was in tears by time I reached my apartment and feeling completely hopeless and like a failure as an adult. I mean isn't every 26 year old supposed to be able to perfectly juggle their life!! HA! It was then I realized that just because I had dropped the ball did not mean I could not pick it back up! I also realized that if I gave up on this class I was taking the easy way out and I would that much more inclined to take the easy road for the rest of my life. So I did the only logical thing....I got on my knees and prayed. After praying I got on my computer and got to work. I worked over 10 hours this weekend on my project, there were times I was ready to throw it out the window but with the help of my Heavenly Father and the encouragment of my roomate I turned it in. I got a 9 out of 10 and the compliments of my instructor! I was so completely thrilled!! I felt like I could conquer anything at the point! It may seem like a simple silly thing but I had pushed myself and I had suceeded! I know that with my Heavenly Father's help and with the great people he has blessed me with in my life I can do anything. I just have to keep going, and when I drop the ball I have to pick it up and try again. So back to the main point. Life really is a bowl of goodness. We are all sitting at the table but it is up to us to decide if we will partake. We must dig in with whatever means we have, silver spoon, fingers, or just slurp it up!!
So today take action and enjoy your "bowl of goodness"!!!

The snow is falling up!!

So today while sitting in my highly entertaining Intermediate Accounting class, I happened to glance out the window and what did I see....snow...falling up!!! It was quite the odd experience after watching for a second I realized it was just the way the wind was hitting the building that made it look that way...It kind of makes me sad that there is more snow. I went to Utah last weekend and there was not any snow on the ground which made me happy. I am so ready for spring this year. More so than I have ever been before. I decided it is because I spent the summer in California with the sun and now my body is craving it!! Ok in all honesty i should not complain. In my head I know that lots of snow brings a beautiful and green Idaho spring so that is what I keep telling myself every time I look out the window and see.....snow falling up.

The joy of a Rexburg winter!

Winters in Rexburg are always hard. There is the constant snow, below zero temperatures, and the ever present wind chill. This winter was proving to be an exception to that rule....until last night. It snowed....and snowed....and snowed! So much for my hopeful thinking that spring would arrive early. Don't get me wrong we need the snow and I am glad it came because it will bring my beautiful Idaho spring. Well the real reason I wrote this is to tell of my adventures getting to the Stake meeting we had tonight. When we went to get to the car all of the doors had frozen shut!! There were 5 of us girls. We managed to get one door open after much effort and I climbed in. I tried unlocking the doors from the inside and after a few minutes of trying I manged to get the rear passanger side unlocked as well. In the mean time Destiny is scraping the window which are so covered in ice we thought the scraper was going to break. (I think she did end up chipping it) By this time we were running seriously late for our meeting so we decided to just climb in. Natalie who was driving had to climb in the passanger side which was quite an amazing feat!! Considering the size of her center console. The rest of us piled in and off we went...sliding all the way! It was such an adventure, there was a lot of giggling and squeeling. And that my friends is one of the many joys of a Rexburg winter!

The Holidays

So holidays around my house are usually pretty uneventful. Enjoyable but uneventful. This year was the same but also different somehow. The nice thing is having my Brother Greg home, up until last year he was living in Jackson Hole running his own business. I guess the stress made a huge difference. He moved into my Mom's house and my Mom now lives with my Grandma. It is like having a whole new Brother! He calls just to talk and he does sweet random things. My Brother and I used to fight alot and we still get on each others nerves but maybe it is just us growing up and realizing what is important in life. Anyhow it was fun to hang out with him and my Sister in Law Daryle. Christmas was nice just family playing games and sledding. It is crazy to think that is is our 5th Christmas without my Dad and usually it is hard but we got through it....as a family. I guess it takes really being home to remind me that this is what life is all about....family. Sometimes they drive me crazy and I want to just have my OWN life, but I need the balance...and occasionally I need to come Home.